*WARNING : THIS POST IS FULL OF CLICHES, SELF-HELP QUOTES & IMAGES AND CHEESY STUFF I LOVE-TO-HATE-BUT-SOMETIMES-NEED OK*
Ok it’s gone mid-February and after a big of a blog hiatus, lots of naps and downtime, I’m ready to face 2023….finally.
I feel like I was unwillingly thrust into this new year and I was only just coming around hazily from Christmas, covid, boughts of illness and then BAM, it’s 2023. I feel like we are trained to hit the new year running, re-freshed and re-vitalised and I’m just over this way of thinking and have been for the last few years. I’ve been having some time away from socials and I have zero regrets.
Life has gotten in the way for me ; I’ve had lots of family situations going on and on-going, I’ve had endless illness since November (!) where I was hospitalised once and then caught covid just before Christmas. I’ve also still got *that* bloody cough – what is that all about?! My daughter had strep, we were in hospital with her too and it got all SO MUCH and so stressful. Anyway, crap stuff aside, I just have been trying to recoup and recover before I throw myself back into blogging and socials again. I didn’t want to force it and I wanted to come back feeling refreshed and energised. This year it’ll be a few changes from me, which you’ll discover a little down the line, but right here on the blog, there will still be a focus on beauty & makeup foremost with a bit of lifestyle, fun fashion and honest chats thrown in.
I absolutely think the New Year it is a great time to consider new habits, reflect on the past year and work out what you WANT from the year ahead, but we shouldn’t feel forced to re-invent ourselves every time Big Ben tolls on a New Year’s Eve. We often don’t need to re-invent ourselves or want change in our lives, it’s a personal journey..but I simply didn’t want to sling open those velvet red curtains on social media with a fake smile and thirst for girl-bossing this year. I see it everywhere. I’m tapping out until I am ready and feeling the vibe.
I have reflected back onto 2022 and admittedly it hasn’t been a great year for me. There are definitely things I want and need to change if I want the life that I want and more happiness. So I do have a list of ‘things’ I am going to try and incorporate into 2023…resolutions, if you will. I hope sharing these, may help you or give you a bit of guidance in how to maybe make your year a little brighter too!
STUFF I’M GOING TO TRY AND DO MORE OF / LESS OF & NEW HEALTHY HABITS.
Social media cull.
(Whispers : even the people you *know*) ….Honestly I did a bit of this last year and it is really good for your MH to detox your social medias : who you follow, who follows you and what you consume. If you are worried about how a person will react to you unfollowing them that’s pretty much already answered the question! If they want to run off and start chatting shit about you then they’ve simply shown themselves for who you thought they were. Anyone who is important to you won’t listen anyway. Stop people pleasing and put yourself first.
If the vibe feels off : remove yourself.
I’ve had a few weird shifts in friendships these last few years, I will only try so much before I step away completely as it can be exhausting and quite honestly…..really upsetting. I’ve cried way too many tears over people who don’t think twice about me. When the interest, check-in’s and questions stop….and it all becomes very one-sided….STEP AWAY. It upsets me as people I expected to be in Margot’s life know nothing about her and show zero authentic interest in our lives…and that has been a hard pill to swallow but you cannot force friends & family to be part of your life. You deserve better and we deserve people to love us not just tolerate us. We all deserve better, babes.
In how you allow people to treat you, talk to you and what they expect from you. This can be work, relationships and everything else in between. sometimes we need to protect our peace ya know! Learn to say no and don’t feel the guilt.
This ties into so many other things I am talking about including the great social media cull, stepping away from friendships, knowing your worth and value in work situations and keeping away from the drama.
Have respect for yourself and don’t settle. Know your goddam worth!
This is a work-focused one ; stop letting brands and PR’s take the piss out of you. A lot of people out there are getting paid ridiculous money for content creation – stop settling for brands who want you send you a couple of products worth £100 for an instagram reel, stories and a post. If you like it you will organically chat about it anyway : it shouldn’t be forced and you shouldn’t be obliged to do *anything* for brands unless there is money and a contract involved. Too many people are saying YES to shitty agreements and it cheapens it for the rest of us. I have learnt to have confidence in what I do and in 2022 I told many a’ brands and PR’s to sod off. I’m over being treated like shit by people in this industry, I’ve been doing it too long, I’m too old and my stats are too good for this bullshit. There I said it.
Stay in my lane.
Social media, influencers, creators, whatever you wanna call it…. this industry is full of verrrrry competitive people all trying to get seen, get paid and be better. It’s become A VERY different world to what us old school crew knew and loved. So we have to adapt or drop out….like really.
This is now serious business and there’s money to be made. With this, comes a lot of cliques, girl gangs, WhatsApp gossip groups and bitchyness. No thank YOU. I have very few around me now who I speak to and allow into my personal space – everyone just ends up competing and falling out and I’ve been stung one too many times now. PS anyone else notice its always the ones who talk about being kind who are usually the fucking worst?! Same.
Be kinder to myself.
I have consistently blamed myself for so many things and actually, I need to not be so hard on myself. It’s not always *me*, I couldn’t always *do better* and sometimes life just throws bad cards your way and you just have to deal with it and react as best you can.
I’m really trying harder to focus on the positive things in my life as opposed to putting so much thought into the bad stuff….which is harder than it seems. I can really dwell on things and it can really eat me up and ruin my day, but I need to keep moving forward and stop letting these things I cannot control effecting me so much.
Focus on what I can control.
Things I can control : how I feel, how I act and react, what I watch and follow, the way I treat others, asking for help, my actions, my words, my beliefs and values.
Things I can’t control : how others feel about me, what people say about me, the news, the weather, the future, other people’s motives, the past.
Success doesn’t mean frantic and manic.
I feel this manic-panic when the the New Year comes around. Everyone is hitting the ground at 150mph and it’s all very noisy and a bit frantic isn’t it?!
For me this year it’s more of ….foot off the pedal, cosy, soft, gentle, authentic, tea breaks, enjoyment, pausing for thoughts, days off, closing that laptop, slower living and nutritious food.
A few healthy habits I want to try and adopt and focus on more.
- Hiking and walking – one of my favourite hobbies that I seemingly have never time to do. I want to try and go off and do a monthly ‘big hike’ on my own to blow out the cobwebs and have some ‘me time’.
- Supplements – I am SO bad at sticking to taking daily supplements but I am going to buy one of those pill packets and prep my weekly supplements. I know the benefits can be incredible and I want to get the right cocktail to give me more energy and make me a bit more focused.
- Better sleep – easier said than done right?! I am currently going to bed earlier (9-9.30pm) and *trying* to get more good quality sleep.
- Putting myself out there : friendships, jobs and opportunities. I’ve honestly lost my confidence A LOT with all of these things because I never think I am good enough and the fear/ anxiety creeps in. I think I’ll mess up, not be good enough and I focus on all the bad things that may happen. I need to try and set aside these feelings as I know I have been missing out on so much.
- Reading! I have a pile of books I purchased last year that haven’t been opened. I absolutely love getting lost in a good book but I simply have felt I don’t have time and I feel guilt when I’m @ home but not working or tidying. I need to set aside some time for reading, even if it’s going up to bed half an hour earlier (hi 8.30pm!) and having some time then.
- Batch cooking more nutritious food. To be both healthier AND more economical with food. Batch cooking is a winner for this household and it just makes meals so much easier when you can just dig something delicious out of the freezer rather than cooking from scratch every evening. Less mess, stress and quick-fix, unhealthy options. Some of my favourite things to batch cook are soups, curries, vege chilli and stews. I will share more recipes really soon!
This may seem like a long list, but it’s not all changes and new things, a lot of them is just boundaries and thinking about things differently. I really feel I have been in a bad place mentally these last few years (I know I’m in the majority!) and I know I have to step up to the plate and make these changes MYSELF. No one else is going to change my inner workings for me and I NEED to be more HAPPY in my day-to-day life. I know once I become more happy and confident within myself, SO many other wonderful changes will happen… I will see my friends more, I will do more social stuff, it will emulate through my work, I will be a better mother and everything will just click better. I want *a bit* of the old Laura back.