You’ve probably heard of Soho Farmhouse, if not for ALLLLLL the big & swanky blogger/press events being held there after it opened, someone, somewhere you know has probably been and you’ve seen their sneaky snaps on Instagram. I say ‘sneaky’ because the Farmhouse etiquette is in align of that with the entire Soho House group ; they don’t like phones. Aside from being anti-social in public places, it allows any members to not have to worry about being papped & keeps privacy and anonymity for all the slebs who are staying.
Soho Farmhouse is a members’ club-slash-swanky country club and resides deep in the Cotwolds amongst 100-acres of land. There is 40 purpose-built cabins where you can sleep 2 up to 14 people, and they come fully equipped with everything one might need for a super-posh country stay. They think about all the *little* things to the necessary from plasma TV’s, retro radio’s, the MOST comfiest (& huge) beds, full-size Cowshed products for you to use at your convenience (& minatures for you to take-away), homemade Farmouse granola for you to eat in the AM with your complimentary milk, that’s if you don’t opt for your personal chef to come up in a little signature mint green milk-float to cook you the full english outside your cabin. Oh, and in the PM’s, you can ask for a personal bartender to come along in aformentioned milk float to come and rustle you up cocktails until the cow’s come home. Moo. There’s lots to do, see & experience and it’s pretty much designed to never make you want to leave.
x3 photos above Copywright Soho Farmhouse www.sohofarmhouse.com
THINGS TO DO /
It is kindaaaaaaa a posh person’s playground, basically. There is lakes for rowing, shops, horse riding, a giant Cowshed Spa, a Josh Wood hair salon, pop-up restaurants, bicycles for cycling around the huge grounds, obviously an indoor AND outdoor pool (it turns from one to the other = magic), gym, spinning, walking, a free cinema, pretentious classes that involve growing your herbs and floristry……everything. You could easily stay here a whole week and not get bored. I LOVE IT.
The Cowshed spa is beautiful and they do every treatment you can imagine. You have individual changing rooms that all have a loo, sink and shower and they come fully equipped with a hairdryer, straightners and all the white, thick, fluffy towels you could ever need. The spa does both Cowshed & Skinceuticals treatments, the shop sells both of these, along with other beauty additions such as the Clarisonic, Oribe haircare and Neville skincare aimed @ the boys.
The main courtyard AKA party central is where a lot of people hang – this is where the big barn restaurant is, a florist, the main bar (opens until the last person fall on the floor FYI), clothes shops which sell ridiculously expensive things, the cheese shop (BUY SOME REBLOCHON), a small coffee shop, ping pong tables and of course those huge rustic fire pits that you have probably seen your arsehole mate on instagram curled around at nightime whilst sipping some form of fancy £15 cocktail.
NO SNAPPING OR SOCIAL /
A Soho house general policy. Yes, there are celebrities there…..but members don’t really care much for that, it’s the norm and they respect the need for privacy, which makes it a nice, relaxed vibe. I’ve seen princesses, actors, singers and famous models there ; no one cares, and they can happily shuffle about in their hunter wellies and trackies with no makeup on without the worry of fans and snappers catching them off-guard as they chow down on their baked truffle eggs. Apparently an overly-eager-but-not-so-subtle-couple tried to catch David & Victoria Beckham in the back of their *selfie*…they had their memberships immediately revoked. LOL GIRL BYE.
The staff are discreet, you won’t get any gossip from them ; and they are all very casual, relaxed and friendly. I heard there was up to 300 staff on site PER DAY fluttering around doing various unimportant-important jobs.
CABINS + ACCOMADATION /
I have stayed there a couple of times now ; once in a 3-bed cabin and then more recently in ‘The Farmhouse’ which is the original house and is the biggest which has 7 double bedrooms. In all honesty the cabins are more impressive with the decor and comfort, but the farmhouse is perfect if you have a large party. Decor is very rustic, luxury and beautiful….as you can imagine.
You will be assigned a ‘farmhand’ with your stay, basically someone who chauffeurs you to your cabin in a shiny Black BMW X5 , will show you around, leave his number if you need…..literally anything. At your cabin, you will have a pair of wellies (in your size….how do they even know?) and one of *those* green Foffa bicycles with your name tag on it (with the seat adjusted to your height….sorcery) to make your stay just that little bit more country.
You are now basically a tweed jacket away from becoming landed gentry.
Your fridge will be stocked with pre-made cocktails, drinks, milk…you get jams, peanut butter (whole/unopened tubs) , freshly baked loaves of bed that is likely to be sourdough coz…trendy, granola & other frilly fancies. I always wonder what they do with every peanut butter tub after it has been used just once?! Thoughts?
FOOD & DINING /
The two main places to eat is the Main Barn and PEN YEN by the pool/lake which is a wonderful Japanese ; think Nobu/Roka style. The main barn is the bigger area, in the main courtyard which serves up traditional english fodder such as flat iron chicken, plaice, triple-cooked chips & fancy salads. Breakfast/brunch is the absolute winner here where they do a buffet which compromises of a pancake and waffle station, all different types of fancy breads and jams, smoked salmon and other picky bits. You can also go A La Carte and get baked eggs, full english and all the usual. If you go, you must order a Bloody Mary no matter what time of the day ; they are sublime.
OK so how do you book? Probably with a little difficulty if you are not a member as I heard that are pretty booked up until Christmas. Priority goes to members when booking rooms, and then they open the bookings to mere mortals AKA non members I think maybe a month before and there is often not much available. Prices start from around £250 per night for a 1-bed cabin. This will change seasonally and if in the week or weekend also.
It’s not cheap, it was never going to be (I think they spent in excess of £100 million on this gaff), but it is 100% worth it for a special occasion/ staycation in the country. You’d be hard-pressed to find a better place to stay in the UK country of you like ‘country’ but with the comfort..just makes sure you get at least 2 nights in so you can make the most of everything that this posh butlins’ has to offer.